Santa’s got a long night ahead of himself come this Christmas Eve, and you know what gets him through…something short and sweet, I’m talking about ESPRESSO! You know the big man is not slim pickins! May sound like nonsense, but Sabrina Carpenter, Espresso, and, well, espresso all make the NICE LIST!
We’ve all been there. You’re out there flossing all the freakin time even though you hate it, and you’ve done a great job, feel good, only to have the dental hygienist ask if you floss.
Can you even believe it?! Rigor Tortoise is performing live again! Prepare yourself for the Wednesday evening you’ve only dreamt of! 9PM! June 26th! At The Clubhouse!
EMERGENCY IMPRESSONATION! That’s right. Sometimes, when you’re the best in the world at impresssonations, the urge strikes, and you gotta do one! Right there, on the road. And this one is a doozy. You know the guy. The early 4-way stop guy. Yeah, well, here he is!
Follow along on Tik Tok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thejustinjohnsonshow
You know that ice cube? The last one in your ice cube tray? Neglected…cold…ICEY! Well, take a seat and prepare to be transported directly into your freezer for an impressonation!
Follow the magic on TikTok!
https://www.tiktok.com/@thejustinjohnsonshow
You know that hair right? It’s on your face, you can feel it but you can’t, and you’re trying so hard to get it off of your face but it’s more elusive than a Yeti! Well, here’s a pretty uncanny impressonation of it.
there’s no doubt about one fact, and one fact only…i’m the best in the world at impressonations. often, people say, “hey justin, come back, where did you go” because my impressonations are so good that i become the person! well, it’s about time i share this talent with the world. watch this, but don’t worry, i’m still there, it’s just an impressonation.
hello…
much like tons of folks, I absolutely lost my mind during the pandemic in a somewhat real way…but I mean, what ARE minds anyway, right?!
to cope with the anxiety of trying to re-enter life and be a human again, I enlisted some friends and shot this true Baghead footage…I’m the Greta Gerwig of 2023.
To be made whole
by being not a witness,
but witnessed.
Check out the latest reely good content! Get it?!? What a time we’re all having! Anyway, here is a reel cut together from some footage from the award winning series, F#cking 40! If you ask me, this guy’s got more range than a Forno Galiano! (That’s a stove joke)
Hey Ya’ll! 2021, AMIRIGHT?!?! Well, I’ll tell you how 2021 can be better…follow me in my new series exclusively on RIZZLE!
As an amateur scientist, I’m trying to find a solution that will allow me to walk through a wall! BREAKTHROUGHS!!!
Download, like, explore and more. THAT RHYMED!
https://share.rizzle.tv/yO8Hbi