Santa’s got a long night ahead of himself come this Christmas Eve, and you know what gets him through…something short and sweet, I’m talking about ESPRESSO! You know the big man is not slim pickins! May sound like nonsense, but Sabrina Carpenter, Espresso, and, well, espresso all make the NICE LIST!
Look, do I think AI and ChatGPT is horrible for the business of creatives, and just in general? Yes! Should I be saying this out loud for fear that robots will murder me? NO I SHOULD NOT! But…I am not good at promoting, and you know who is? My ol friend ChattyGPTizzle. Here’s what I asked, and here’s what I got. You know this post is gonna go so viral and our show is gonna be bigger than Babs at The Hollywood Bowl!
What I asked, and probably would have used because I’m just a dumb human:
Create an image post that I can use on Instagram to announce a live show Rigor Tortoise is having this Friday at The Brickhouse Theater in North Hollywood. The show is at 8PM and it is the return of Greg Castle! Greg was abducted many years ago, and we’re so happy he escaped his captors, and the very first thing he wanted to do was an improv show. The show is $15, and includes food and drink from King’s Hawaiian. King’s Hawaiian was a staple of my youth as a very fat kid. I’d eat the whole tray, and guess what, I wouldn’t put it in the oven, I’d raw dog it. Oh, and make this like a teaser, you know? Cuz we still got a week, so I gotta post over and over again. Also, I don’t think there is a link. But, people can figure it out, right? It might be at the door? Okay, make this Instagram post! Also, it’s gotta go viral baby!
What I freakin got!
🎉 IT’S ALIVE! 🎉
Get ready for an EPIC night of laughs and surprises! Rigor Tortoise is BACK with an incredible live show this Friday at The Brickhouse Theater in North Hollywood!
🗓️ Date: This Friday
🕗 Time: 8 PM
📍 Location: The Brickhouse Theater, North Hollywood
💥 THE RETURN OF GREG CASTLE 💥
Yes, you read that right! Greg Castle is BACK! After being abducted years ago, he miraculously escaped his captors. And what’s the first thing he wanted to do? An IMPROV SHOW with YOU! 🙌
🎟️ Admission: $15
Includes delicious food and drink from King’s Hawaiian! 🍍
King’s Hawaiian was a staple of my youth. I used to devour the entire tray raw – no oven needed! 😋
This is just a teaser, folks! Stay tuned for more updates as we count down to the big day. Spread the word, grab your friends, and let’s make this night unforgettable!
No link needed – you know where to find us!
🔥 #RigorTortoise #GregCastleReturns #LiveShow #ImprovComedy #KingsHawaiian #ComedyNight #NorthHollywoodEvents #ItsAlive
Can you even believe it?! Rigor Tortoise is performing live again! Prepare yourself for the Wednesday evening you’ve only dreamt of! 9PM! June 26th! At The Clubhouse!
EMERGENCY IMPRESSONATION! That’s right. Sometimes, when you’re the best in the world at impresssonations, the urge strikes, and you gotta do one! Right there, on the road. And this one is a doozy. You know the guy. The early 4-way stop guy. Yeah, well, here he is!
Follow along on Tik Tok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thejustinjohnsonshow
You know that hair right? It’s on your face, you can feel it but you can’t, and you’re trying so hard to get it off of your face but it’s more elusive than a Yeti! Well, here’s a pretty uncanny impressonation of it.
There’s no doubt about the fact that Justin Johnson is the best in the world at impressonations. Watch how uncanny it is when he impressonates a record producer for the world famous powerhouse talent that is Megan Thee Stallion.
Follow along on TikTok if you like. Who knows, maybe one day I’ll figure out how to edit things together and give you a list of places to eat and/or a recipe for how to make a cheesy gordita crunch…spoiler alert, it’s one step, you just go to Taco Bell and buy it.
Wow! I mean, there are impersonations, and then there are impressonations. And I don’t think anyone would disagree with the fact that the below impressonation of a sad “do not enter” sign is so spot on, it’s jarring! This is not AI, this is not an actual “do not enter” sign. This is just the work of the best impressonator in the game right now!
Probably the most realistic impressonation you’ll ever see. We all got that friend, or know that person who knows how to figure out what side of the car the gas tank is on.
Well, well, well…got my hands on this baby, and I’m ready to LEAK IT TO THE WORLD! That’s right ol Santa Clause, THE WORLD NEEDS TO KNOW!
Follow along as I reveal these sweet secrets on:
Wowy zowy…first and foremost, you’re probably asking yourself, who says “wowy zowy” that isn’t an infant? Well…ME! And why would I use such strong language? Well, I was nominated for a Maverick Movie Award – Best Supporting Actor! What an honor! AND…I’m not the only one nominated, check out all the noms for F#cking 40 below!